Modern MG is a sort of strange beast; there’s that familiar octagonal Morris Garages monogram, but the cars it tends to be attached to just don’t seem anything like what I normally associate with MG. There’s reasons for this, of course; modern MG is a sort of zombie resurrected by China’s SAIC Motor, and now mostly makes things like crossovers and SUVs, you know, things that actually sell, which isn’t really what MG ever used to be about.
MG certainly sold cars that weren’t their iconic roadsters, of course, like the MG 1100 or the MG Metro, for example, but modern MG has a lineup of cars that could pass for Kias or Mazdas or whatevers from a distance.
Well, except for one, maybe. They do still make one more traditional-style small roadster, though they decided to give it kind of an eye-rolly name: the Cyberster.
Our own cranky Brit Adrian wrote about these back in 2023, but yesterday at Goodwood was the first time I personally got to see one up close. And I have to tell you, I was kind of excited by the taillights.
Now, the taillights have been discussed before, in Adrian’s earlier post, and I even commented on his commentary via the god-like power of an Editor’s Note:
Round the back is where they’ve really let their creativity run wild. It looks like they couldn’t decide between two equally bad tail lamp graphics and decided to use both of them. The problem is the upper horizontal one with the vertical elements at the end is that it’s a rigid shape that doesn’t work with the curvaceousness of the rear fenders. Look at the ends and you can see the issue – that sharp 90-degree corner creates two creases that run into the rear three quarter. It’s like trying to squeeze a perfectly square robot shit out of a soft round human asshole. The arrows, I just can’t. [Editor’s Note: If the arrows illuminate as the turn indicators I think I can’t help but like that. Sorry, Adrian. Haven’t you always wanted a sports car with these? – JT] Ugh. What’s frustrating is I actually really like the way it looks like the horizontal part is one continuous piece piercing through the narrower section of the rear panel – but the arrowheads feel like they were going to copy MINIs Union Jack lights and then bottled it. Somewhere in between these two bad ideas there’s a good idea trying to get out, but with this they’ve chosen taillight violence over diplomacy.
Now, I don’t necessarily disagree with Adrian’s assessment here – who could take issue with commentary like “…trying to squeeze a perfectly square robot shit out of a soft round human asshole...” – but I do have to admit that the soft, round asshole typing this right now definitely had some feelings when I saw those taillights up close:
See that? They have a very bold taillight graphic motif involving those arrows. MG leans into this pretty hard, as you can see the taillights featured prominently in an animation on the Cyberster’s site:
They know what they’ve got here, and they’re showing it off.
Now, I’m fond of bold taillight designs and the use – all too rare outside of the school bus, fire engine, and sometimes ambulance world – of clear, directional arrows for rear turn indicators. Taillights are, fundamentally, a communications tool, so why not have some fun by blatantly showing the direction of the intended turn?
While the MG Cyberster taillights seem like they’d do that, the implementation I think leaves something to be desired. Specifically, the way the turn indicators actually illuminate and, significantly, when, isn’t done the way I’d like.
This is how the rear turn indicators actually, um, indicate:
See that little amber >? That’s the rear indicator. Let’s zoom in. COMPUTER! Zoom, and enhance!
Now, here’s my issue: the whole of the arrow should illuminate amber when indicating a turn, and that means not just the arrowhead, but the shaft, too. And, significantly, the arrow should not illuminate in red as part of the general taillight, as that blunts the impact of the arrow when it’s actually to do its job.
Here’s what I would suggest for MG to improve this setup. The basic taillight could illuminate like this, with the just the arrow shaft glowing red:
…and then when a turn is indicated, we could have a very nice, bold, expressive rear indicator like this:
Look at that! It could be the most blatant, clear, and unquestioningly bold expression of a driver’s intent to turn of any car on the road! Confident and clear, bellowing out to the world HERE I AM AND I INTEND TO TURN LEFT!
They’re so close; they just need a little bit of reprogramming to make these things really something special, indicator-wise. This might even help Britain regain some dignity after the embarrassment of those Mini taillights that pointed arrows in the wrong directions.
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