You Can Buy A V8-Powered Mercedes C63 AMG For The Price Of America’s Cheapest New Car

Today’s performance cars really have to do everything, don’t they? The modern blueprint includes a slug of turbocharged torque, the security of all-wheel-drive, enough noise insulation to spit a verse in the cabin, enough toys to make Best Buy look like a mennonite enterprise, out-of-this-world test track numbers, and surprisingly reasonable fuel economy for what you get. The W204 Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG doesn’t care much for any of that. It’s a four-wheeled four-letter word, and in today’s performance car landscape where almost everything even somewhat attainable seems like a good citizen of the road, it feels like eating chips in church. Sometimes being immoral just feels way too damn good.

In case you just awoke from cryogenic freezing initiated during the Great Recession, the new Mercedes-AMG C63 S E Performance is seeing all kinds of vitriol for featuring a four-cylinder hybrid powertrain. Sure, it may make a boatload of power and be objectively a great performer, but four isn’t as much of a party as eight.

So, with the future not looking as visceral as the past, let’s give the original C63 AMG a good hard look. Not only does it feature the Suge Knight of naturally aspirated German V8 engines, you can now pick up an early example for dirt freaking cheap. Let’s party.

What Are We Looking At

For a while in the 2000s, BMW felt untouchable in the supersedan arena. The E39 M5 handed out ass-whooping left and right, the E60 M5 had a V10, and people knew that the then-incoming E90 BMW M3 would be rocking a high-revving small-displacement V8. Then AMG dropped a 6.2-liter V8 into a C-Class. Yeah, the W204 C63 AMG was born great, with a thumping M156 V8 cranking out 451 horsepower and 443 lb.-ft. of torque in base trim. For those keeping track at home, that’s 37 more horsepower and 143 more lb.-ft. of torque than a V8-powered E90 BMW M3. So what if the C63 AMG only came with a seven-speed automatic transmission? The sheer torque of the thing mashed the M3’s face in if you lined both cars up in a straight line.

In a 2007 Car And Driver comparison test, the C63 AMG ran from zero-to-60 mph in 3.9 seconds and blitzed the quarter mile in 12.3 seconds at 116 mph. That was four-tenths of a second, half a second, and three mph quicker than the M3 on test. More importantly, the five-to-60 mph test came in worlds apart, with the C63 clocking 4.2 seconds and the M3 clocking five seconds flat. In this arena, eight tenths is an enormous amount of time, which made the C63 AMG a force to be reckoned with. So much of a force that Car And Driver actually called it a bit much, thanks in part to seriously starchy suspension.

In the end, we found the C63 to offer the most special experience in this highly desirable trio, but as the days wore on, we became slightly less enamored with the Mercedes’ aggressive behavior and looks—the creases, the bulges, the vents, and the gaping front fascia could almost pass as an aftermarket job in this tasteful group. But if you like to be seen, heard, and talked about, the C63 is your Lamborghini of sports sedans.

Here’s the thing, though — in an age of downsizing and hybridization, a 6.2-liter overhead cam V8 in a sedan the size of a Civic is freaking awesome. Not only does the C63 AMG feel like a muscle car in a suit, it makes all the right noise. We’re talking “Vanishing Point” amplified through Steve Aoki’s decks and blasted at the speed of sound directly into the face of the driver behind you. It’s provocative. It gets the people going. And it can be yours for less than the price of the cheapest new car in America.

How Much Are We Talking?

The cheapest new car in America is the Nissan Versa S with the five-speed manual gearbox, stickering for $17,820 including freight. While you certainly aren’t getting a facelifted C63 AMG for that sort of money, you can totally get an early car within that budget, such as this 2010 C63 AMG that hammered on Cars & Bids last month for $13,300. Sure, it might have 121,500 miles on the clock, a hit on its Carfax, a broken tilt function for the steering column, and the expected cosmetic wear of a used car, but it’s also seen its head bolts preventatively replaced, and the person who won it claimed it drove “13 hours and 930 miles home without a hiccup.” Hell yeah.

Oh, but we can go cheaper than that. Earlier this year, this 2009 Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG hammered on Cars & Bids for $12,200, and while it may be rocking a whopping 148,000 miles on the clock and have a minor hit on its Carfax, it has the P30 Performance Package that bumps output to 481 horsepower, adds a limited-slip differential, and raises the top speed limit to 174 mph. Alexa, play “Kickstart My Heart.”

Even on the private market, you still have some selection in this price bracket. Here’s a 2009 Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG up for sale at a used car dealer in Ohio for $14,500. Sure, it might have 142,728 miles on the clock, and it probably won’t be perfectly reliable, but this is one kick-ass car for the money.

What Could Possibly Go Wrong With A Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG?

Oh man, all sorts of stuff, but some are issues in small numbers, so it really just depends on how much risk you want to take on. The M156 V8 engine in these cars was notorious for head bolt failure on cars with an engine serial number smaller than 156983 60 060658, so early 2011 model year and prior cars. It’s fixable with the engine still in the car for about $3,000 to $3,500, but if you’re already in there, you might want to replace a few other things on a high-mileage example.

Lifter failure is an uncommon but noted issue in pre-facelift W204 C63 AMG sedans, and if you already have the top end open, you might want to replace the lifters too. Figure another $883.59 in parts from FCP Euro and 2.8 hours of book labor. If they aren’t changed soon after they show signs of being problematic, your camshafts are going to have a bad time. Oh, and while you’re in there, it’s probably worth changing the air oil separator, as they’re known to go bad and are fairly cheap to replace.

Oh, and the final issue worth noting is conductor plate failure inside the seven-speed automatic transmission, a bastard of a job for DIY-ers because it requires the new part to be coded to the car using Mercedes-Benz diagnostic equipment. Yeah, that bill’s gonna have a comma in it.

Should You Buy A Cheap Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG?

Honestly, if you’re on a budget and can’t wrench, a cheap Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG is up there on the list of bad ideas with trusting the gas station sushi. However, if you can spin a ratchet and want to deploy heinous horsepower with extreme prejudice as you commit acts of ultraviolence against rear tires, all while looking prim and proper at the office, a cheap Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG is exactly what you need.

It’s a NASCAR Spritz at a wedding, a Kubrick stare in a Zoom meeting, an act of enormity that perfectly explains the vitriol against the new, downsized, hybridized C63 AMG. The people don’t want F1-derived technology or clever wizardry. The people want an anti-hero, and the W204 C63 AMG is the perfect caped miscreant.

(Photo credits: Cars & Bids, Autotrader seller)

Support our mission of championing car culture by becoming an Official Autopian Member.

• What’s This Regular-Ass Volkswagen Jetta Doing On Bring A Trailer?

• This Ridiculously Clean Cadillac Cimarron Looks Like A Great $5,100 Luxury Car

• This Innocuous Saturn Sky Hides A Seven-Liter V8 Secret

• This Pristine 2004 Scion xB Just Sold For $2,685 Above MSRP

• You Can Buy An Audi R8 For The Price Of A New Ford Mustang

Got a hot tip? Send it to us here. Or check out the stories on our homepage.

The post You Can Buy A V8-Powered Mercedes C63 AMG For The Price Of America’s Cheapest New Car appeared first on The Autopian.